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Most Magic players know the basic rules of conduct and the proper respect you should show your opponent while playing Magic at a tournament level, but once in a while you get some random dude who seems to have been raised in a barn. He will taunt you before playing, claiming to be the best player in the world and throw tantrums when he loses, blaming his defeat on mana screw. They are rare in Sydney and just when I thought that they have finally been bred out through natural selection, I manage to encounter one at the Sydney PTQ Nice last Sunday.

It was at the 3rd round of the swiss, and as I sat down at the allocated table my opponent, lets call him random kid A, came to me and said 'Hey, can I kill you quickly because my friend and I want to go to get something to eat afterwards?' Stunned by such outrageous manners, I reply: 'If you're in a hurry for food, you can always concede'. Random kid A does not seem too happy about this reply, so he adds 'My deck is really broken' and to that I merely smile and say: 'Bring it on'.

So we go on playing the first round and he crushes me because I was stuck on 3 lands for 10 turns, while he brings out Mystic Enforcer and Roar of the Wurm. I scooped to that since I see no point of going on. Random kid A gloats 'Told you my deck is broken' then turned around to his friend and said 'This will be over pretty soon'. I did not bother to inform him that I was mana screwed, since it seems to be the weak thing to do blaming my defeat on fate. After seeing his deck and his so called playing skill I am confident that if I do not suffer another mana screw, I will flatten him in less then 10 turns, because though random kid A has a 'fun' deck and some 'cute' combos, his deck is no where near as broken as he thought. Want to see a broken deck? Just look at mine:

Random kid A cast something in between, but I forgot what they were since they seemed so insignificant in comparison to what I was bringing out. At his 6th turn, random kid A said, 'Umm, I don't think I can beat that' but kept playing and I gladly handed him his ass, savoring every moment. Third game was a bit of a let down since Random kid A got color screwed but he would not have had a chance anyway, since I went:

Once again I forgot what he was trying to cast since I was too busy beating him. Random kid A moaned about how unlucky he was and wondered aloud how could he and his broken deck possibly loose to little old me? To that I could not help saying 'Well, at least now you have plenty of time to eat'. After the game, random kid A tell his friend that he would have beaten me if he did not get color screwed and had the audacity to ask me if that is true in front of his friends. I reply a 'maybe' not because I want to save him some face in front of his friends but I see no point in enlightening him on the fact that he is a crap player. Let him think that he is better then Kai Budde and continue to play crap for the rest of his life, I think it is a better revenge then telling him what a random kid A he was. By failing to recognize your own weakness and the strength of your opponent, you will never learn anything from the games you play. The next time you lose a game of Magic, think about what really made you lose you that game instead of whipping out the good old mana screw/bad draw excuse.

Oh by the way, I ended up winning that PTQ splitting the money with Scott Smith whom did a little Werebear dance to celebrate his first PTQ win. With the extra funding this year, I can stay in a decent lodging and try to have more fun (and sleep) then I had last year. Stay tuned to MtG Paradise to read all about my adventures and the inside scoop in the Australian Nationals 2002 in my 3-part article next month.